Everybody Needs Deadlines

 

Keith and I work differently.  

Whenever I have a task, I see if I can finish it now; or at least before the end of the day.

Keith (left) always asks, "What is the deadline for this?"  He works off of that date and often waits to the last minute to start a project.  The reason for this is that he thinks about it for a LONG time. 

Sometimes we'd be walking and I'd ask him a question and he wouldn't respond.  I'd ask him, "Are you programming?" and he'd smile.  Yes, that is the reason why he waits to start a project; he starts programming it in his head for days.  I instead, start outlining the project and create a planning document of the steps I need to do. I work with deadlines also, but rarely wait until close to the deadline to start the task.  Yes, I was that person in school that asked, "Can we start on this now?"  I like to get things done early and there is a problem with that.  If you don't spend the time to "program" it out in your head, you might miss some valuable ideas.

We recently went to the Magic Kingdom to see the progress of the new Tron ride.  We found  this sign with Walt Disney's quote, "Everyone needs deadlines."  I thought it was so fitting for Keith and took this picture.  Disney is a big part of our lives today.  We both grew up going to Disneyland since it opened right after we were born and our grandparents lived up in Orange/LA area - so that made trips there special.  After we got married, we'd go there at least once a year and then when we moved here to Florida over a decade ago, we became Florida Resident Annual Passholders.  This means we pay one annual fee and can go as many times as we want.  We currently go twice a week but when we fully retire in two more years, we'll up that to three times a week.  

Guess what?  We don't like to ride most of the rides.  Instead it is a great place to walk.  Keith had a stroke over three years ago and lost his balance.  Instead of the more common, ischemic stroke, Keith had the very dangerous, hemorrhagic stroke that only has a 26% survival rate.  It happened at a training seminar that we were presenting for our software and across the street was the hospital.  The wife of our General Manager insisted on taking him over there (he wanted to go home) and we think that saved his life.  If he had gone home, he would have gone to sleep and probably died. It was deep in his brain; in the cerebellum area that controls balance.  It took many months of physical therapy to get him walking again and now years of continued walking therapy to increase his balance to prevent falls.  

My favorite place is Disney's Animal Kingdom that has uneven walkways through winding paths and lots of things to look up and see.  This is great for Keith's balance therapy.  Going to the other parks when they are crowded provides a whole other challenge; dodging little kids, strollers, and ECVs.  Now about 4 years later, he is about 99% recovered and has lost almost a 100 pounds.  He can go up ladders again, although I'm always next to him for safety.  Next month, we're walk/running a 5K at Disney which will be a challenge since it starts in the early morning dark.  But we've been training for it all year and we're excited for the challenge.  We knew the deadline of the run, and worked backwards on what we needed to do.  So, yes - everyone needs deadlines; it helps get you to the finish line.

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandijerome.com/

Eating New Things

 

One of things that I’m learning about living in Florida (along with alligators, hurricanes, and bugs) is that the same plants that I have grown for years, do not thrive in Florida.  But other plants do.  I tried and tried to grow the typical garden favorites; broccoli, corn, and spinach, but they do not do well in our hot humid climate.  But these are a few new things I have learned to grow and like to eat – and they are good for me!  This is a picture of my granddaughter, Suby who is off the Florida Keys, learning about how wonderful Florida can be for free food.  The best food is the food that you grow yourself!

Longevity Spinach (Gynura Procumbens)

This easy to grow plant (just take a clipping and stick in the ground) can help lower levels of cholesterol, blood pressure, and triglycerides in the body. Research shows that along with lowering sugar levels, the ethanol extract of the plant’s leaves has anti-hyperlipidemic effects as well. Another benefit is weight loss, considering the plants fat lowering properties.   Longevity spinach has also become famous for its anti-inflammatory effects. It contains many bioactive constituents, alkaloids and steroids. These steroids and alkaloids found in the plant play a vital role in warding off inflammation. Its leaves have a mild taste so they can be crushed and put in smoothies, soups, or teas.  I use it as my lettuce in sandwiches or in salads.  I am also trying to grow its cousin, Okinawa Spinach, (Gynura crepioides) but the squirrels seem to like that.  I bought both plants as little 4” starters on Etsy, but now I have plenty around the yard. Each serving contains about 4.5 grams of protein in a 3.5 ounce serving. 

Red Leaf Hibiscus (Hibiscus acetosella)

This one I started from seeds that I got on Etsy. Both the foliage and flowers of 'Panama Red' Hibiscus are edible. Young leaves have a tart, lemony flavor, are rich in vitamin C and thiamin, and may be eaten raw or cooked. Its red foliage also adds color and flavor to salads. It makes a great addition to salads or sandwiches and you can also add it to your smoothies. When it comes to cooking, it is good in stir-fry, soups, or steam it like spinach. What many people like about it, is that it is not losing its nice red color after cooking. Older, tough leaves and calyxes can be used fresh (chopped or crashed), or dried (and crushed), to make a nice herbal tea, that taste quite sour and fruity.   Every 100g of leaves of Hibiscus acetosella is providing 42 cal and 2.88g of protein, 67mg of vitamin C and 3409g of beta-carotene. Because of its oxalic acid content its leaves should not be consumed raw in excess, and avoided by persons suffering from urinary stones. Boiling and steaming significantly reduce oxalic acid content.

Papaya (Carica papaya)

My first papaya tree got too large, so I had to remove it.  Now I have been growing smaller versions from the seeds of it. They truly grow like weeds if you scoop a handful of seeds from the center and toss them in the ground. I trim them down to keep them growing low, and I use the males  in the yard to shade other plants. This year, I got a few females out of the batch of seeds I planted that are ready to fruit. Papayas contain high levels of antioxidants vitamin A, vitamin C, and vitamin E. Diets high in antioxidants may reduce the risk of heart disease. The antioxidants prevent the oxidation of cholesterol. A medium-sized contains about 119 calories. 1.3 grams of protein. 30 grams of carbohydrates.  I like to cut it into squares like cantaloupe; sprinkle a little lime and stevia on it and eat as a treat.

Do I miss my crop of corn, spinach, and broccoli? Sure, but some many other things  grow well like sweet potatoes (like weeds) and potatoes.  I  have been transforming my tiny yard that had an ugly palm and 2 woody scrubs and tons of rubber bark, into a tropical oasis with my own organic food! 

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandijerome.com/

You are Bigger

 

My granddaughter, Vrinda graduated this year from the University of North Florida with a degree in Biology with a concentration in Coastal Environmental Science.  My hope is that someday she will save our world from devastating climate change. One of my favorite memories of Vrinda was when I took her down to the beach when she was about two.   She would love to run out to the water’s edge but was terribly frightened by seagulls and would run back up to me on my blanket.  I knew she wanted to be out there with her sisters playing, so I had a talk with her and said, “You are this tall,” holding out my hand over her head. “the seagulls are only this tall,” as I moved my hand low to the ground.  “All you have to do is run towards them and shout, “Go Away, go away!  The seagulls are afraid of you because you are bigger.”  Vrinda tried it and was delighted to be able to make the seagulls fly away.  She would run up and down the beach shouting at them, “Go Away, go away!  From then on, her favorite game when we'd go to the beach would be to immediately clear the area of any seagulls.  

We were on a business trip when Janet went into labor with Vrinda.  I had asked our accountant, Lena to come over and help watch Chandra and Tulaasi after Janet went into the hospital.  Keith and I boarded the plane, thinking that when we arrived, we’d have another grandchild.  When we called from the airport, we found that although Janet was in the hospital; she had not had the baby yet.  We sent Lena home and took the girls over to our house to wait.  It seemed like minutes after we had arrived home that Janet had Vrinda.  We always thought that Vrinda waited until we got there.  We were delighted with this cute and smiling baby.  Vrinda was the first one that Keith and I had been around from the start, and I think that caused a special bond between us.  She tore a pretty big hole our hearts.  When they would bring the girls over to stay with us, Vrinda would always jump on my lap with her bottle hanging from her mouth.  She’d turn my head towards her and say, “Grandma, I want to tell you about my bad dream last night.”   Vrinda was special to Tulaasi.  Finally, no longer the youngest, Tulaasi seemed to rise to the occasion when Vrinda came along.  Tulaasi would lay on the floor and look at Vrinda and gently touch the side of Vrinda’s face. She would talk "baby talk" to Vrinda. Tulaasi was finally the bigger sister.

I grew up like the Gorgonites; the heroes of a movie called Small Soldiers.  They were not brave, instead they had a knack for hiding.  My brother was bigger and a bully who beat me up; both physically and emotionally.  I was insecure and thought of myself as little.  A friend at work one day said to me, "Sandi, you intimidate others."   I was shocked!  Me, thought of as intimidating?  How can that be?  He explained, "you're very smart and smarter than everyone else here.  They find that intimidating."  I had worked most of my life in the car business where having an education was not a strong point; in fact I rarely mentioned that I was a CPA and had a degree in Accounting with a minor in Computer Science.  Typically the General Manager or owner had a "PHD."  That doesn't meant an advanced degree, rather that meant "poppa had a dealership."  He got the job because his dad, grandfather, etc. owned the dealership.

Was I an intellectual bully?  I realized that I didn't like training people; I couldn't understand how they couldn't understand how things worked or aspire to a higher position.  I didn't have empathy for those that were content to be at the same level, lacking the ambition to learn more and grow.   My friend would lector me, "Sandi, not everyone can be the CFO like you; the world also needs file clerks."  Later when I started a software company, my "bigger brain" got worse.  When someone would be using our software and wanted our product to look like their old antiquated previous system, I didn't get it.  Didn't they want the speed and power of better technology?  

I'm not sure if I'll ever be cured of being an intellectual bully.  I never thought of myself as pretty, but I knew I was smart and could figure anything out if I had a manual or an Internet connection.  But I am also self-aware, so I've stepped down from running my software company and in my place are empathic professionals that work carefully with our customers, helping them use our software, regardless of their ability to learn or understand instructions.  I am trying to be bigger and stop yelling at people to "go away, go away!"

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandijerome.com/

No More Drugs

 

My brother, Stan was a drug dealer.  In high school he was more of a distributor; a good source for weed and speed. I was a customer for weed twice, and unfortunately got some speed as a graduation gift from him to help Laura and me stay awake grad night.  It made us both very sick and when I finally went to sleep, I slept most of the next day. 

 

Stan later moved up a step and created a crack/meth lab.  My dad eventually got Stan into treatment and disassembled the lab, but the damage to Stan’s health was already done.  Stan died of nasal cancer at 62.  It is a rare cancer, but some studies show that it can be caused by snorting drugs.  The nose was not designed to snort powder.

I inherited two autoimmune diseases; from my dad's side arthritis, and from my mom's side psoriasis.  Treatment for these over the years included lots of drugs including tranquillizers, steroids, and photochemotherapy drugs.  I also took dozens of supplements to try and get healthy. 

Today I only take 2 pills a day; a low dose aspirin in the morning to keep my blood thin to avoid strokes and at night melatonin, a hormone that decreases as we age.  Instead of taking dozens of supplements, I decided to get healthy through diet and exercise instead. As a science buff, I do a lot of research on how to get the nutrients I need through food and grow a lot of that in my own organic garden.  My latest additions are longevity spinach and Okinawa spinach, a cousin of longevity spinach.  The name “Longevity” refers to its health benefits in lowering blood sugar, inflammation, and cholesterol.

In my 40s and 50s, I had packed on an extra 50 pounds from my lean high school weight.  I was always slightly underweight growing up, so this was a puzzlement for me to be gaining weight. I first tried various diets; settling on vegan/pescatarian diet to try and avoid the cancer cursing our family.  I bought a treadmill desk to try and walk off the pounds, and of course all those supplements.  Then I started looking at the science of weight gain and weight loss.  The weight gain was simple.  I was under a lot of stress and the drug cortisol caused my body to start holding onto my fat.  Cortisol in nature is essential for my body's fight or flight response; however, it caused fat storage in my abdomen. This belly fat accumulated and caused far more health issues including my weight gain and inflammation to trigger my autoimmune diseases.

I found four things to lower my belly fat; eating good fats, intermittent fasting, adjusting my metabolism and core strength training. I've gotten 40 of those extra 50 pounds gone; but it did take a few years.  I started first with my core strength training since that is best when you have all the extra weight.  You might think that "I'll diet and lose some weight so that exercise will be easier" but actually this extra weight is like carrying around free dumbbells all day.  Everything you do will be more effective in this phase.  I worked with a physical trainer and have a daily routine of planks, chairs, tippy toes, etc.  I combined this with yoga for a great core training routine.  I've lost 6 inches in my belly and become rather strong.  It is great in my gardening to be able to dig and pick up things without getting a sore back.  I like being strong.  I've already covered in another post the good fats  and I'll discuss the metabolism in my next blog.  In the meantime, focus on using your extra weight to your advantage!

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandijerome.com/

Finding Your Own Happiness and the Japanese Diet

 

My granddaughter, Chandra was born in Hawaii. When it came time for her first birthday,  her parents didn't have a lot of money, so they gave her the gift of happiness for her birthday.  They made sure for the full day that she got whatever she wanted and didn't cry.  She got her favorite foods, picked up whenever she wanted, hugged, and lots of kisses.  After lunch, they took her for a ride in her little wagon along the road from their house in Aikahi Park to the beach where she loved to see the ducks along Aikahi Loop.

When I lived to Hawaii, I found it one of the happiest places on earth.  Our first house was on Hauoli Street in Kailua town - Hauʻoli means happy in Hawaiian. Keith recently remarked that his happiest times in Hawaii were walking with me along Lanikai Beach that was a block away.  The song, White Sandy Beach of Hawaiʻi by Israel Kamakawiwoʻole still pulls us back to those times.  Why is Hawaii a happy place? Maybe it is because so many people are there on vacation or maybe it is the spirit of Aloha.  One of the things that delighted me in Hawaii was the Asian cuisine.  I worked for Mike McKenna who was one of the first investors of Roy's Restaurants and friends with the founder, Roy Yamaguchi.  We'd eat often at the original Roy's in Hawaii Kai  where there is a tribute to Mike on the wall as you walk in.  Whenever we would dine there, Roy would come to the table wearing a McKenna Windward Ford baseball cap and prepare some special new dish for us to try.  Roy's blend of Asian and Hawaiian cuisine help me discover the  Japanese diet.  

The Japanese word for happiness is Kōfuku which means; euphoria, bliss, blessedness, satisfaction, beatitude.  The Japanese diet is a focus on satisfaction.  The Japanese Diet is the reason that Japan has some of the longest life expectancies in the world.  But what is less well known is that Japanese women have the lowest rates of obesity (only 2.9%) in modern cultures.  Naomi Moriyama writes in her book, Japanese Women Don’t Get Old or Fat that the basic elements of the Japanese approach to eating is “not a diet plan but a whole new way of falling in love with food”.  The emphasis is on small portions of fresh seasonal food.  We need to value quality over quantity and to eat slowly so as to appreciate the flavors of the food and reach a feeling of satisfaction with less food.  I like to call my plan the ELF plan - or  eat less food.  I eat whatever I want, but less of it.

The Japanese put a great deal of emphasis on visual presentation and making the food look beautiful and appealing to the eye.   I recently made a new dish called frushi that I discovered at the Epcot Flower and Garden Festival.  It is sort of a cantaloupe/pineapple sushi.

https://recipesofdisney.com/frushi/

 Here are the basic plan of what I eat;

Fish - salmon.  I prepare a nice salmon filet for our Sunday brunch and then use fresh wild canned salmon to make "tuna salad" with vegan mayo, mustard, celery, and pickles.

Vegetables - lots of kale and sweet potato that I grow organically in my yard.

Rice (preferably brown) but I also like sticky rice and risotto.  

Soy (tofu, miso soup, soy sauce) and frozen vegan Gardein products made from soy, but I try to stick to more unprocessed food.

Fruit such as apples, grapes, and watermelon.

Green tea.  It is hot in Florida, so each morning I brew 2 cups of green tea, add stevia, then pour into 6 Rubbermaid-BPA free 16 oz water bottles filled 90% with water, then put in the refrigerator to give me an all day source of water and green tea.

The diet also recommends noodles, but I haven't figure that out yet, but plan to add it later since  I know it has lots of carbs and I'm still trying to burn fat with 10 more pounds to go.  I avoid the 8 bad fats and use only olive, coconut, and avocado oil.

Dairy and bread are not part of my diet and when I do eat pork, beef and chicken they are regarded more as a special treat rather than the main focus of the meal. Fresh fruit is my preferred dessert however if a richer dessert is eaten it is in very small quantities.  I often get the latest cupcake at Disney World to sample it, but I cut it open, then eat a few bites. 

I am truly happy; probably the happiest I have been in my life.  I run/walk each day, do yoga, and strength building exercises.  I have lost 40 pounds and have 10 more to go.  I think my diet and health are a big part of this, but more importantly, I have found my own bliss.  I no longer look to others to make me happy for the day, I keep myself happy.

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandijerome.com/

 

Fearless

 

Suby is the youngest of my four granddaughters, but I think of her as being fearless.  Once while I was visiting them at their house in Eugene, a truck backed into my van that was parked out front.  All I heard was a loud crunch.  I went out to see what had happened, and my son followed me out. While I was talking to the guy who hit my van and seeing if there was any damage, my son ordered me to go back into the house and he’d handle it.  It really wasn’t a problem – I couldn’t see any damage, but he shouted at me, “Get in the house!” 

When he came back inside, he started yelling at me, saying “When I tell you to get inside – you need to do it!”  I was appalled.  He didn’t seem to have any problem with me flying alone all over the country to make enough money to support him and his family, but he wanted control over me in what he considered “his house” that we were paying for.  He was yelling at me so loud, that it woke up Suby who was taking a nap, and she ran full force out of her room and pushed him hard and said, “don’t you talk to my Grandma like that!”  She was so little, barely walking and he was so big – it shocked us both.  I just scooped her up and held her while he left.  Suby never really knew her father well, he had abandoned his family when she was very young and all she knew was this "stranger" was yelling at the grandma she loved. My son is no longer with us, and the best part of our lives was helping to raise those four granddaughters.

In this picture above she has hiked Olomana Trail which was probably the most terrifying hike I have been on and it the trail where her parents fell in love. Her friend, shows how steep and narrow these peaks and their trails are in Hawaii. In another picture, she is doing a handstand on that narrow trail. Gasp! I was shocked, since I pretty much hiked most of the way on my bottom. I struggle to less afraid of almost everything.

She went to New York recently for her birthday with her boyfriend and we took her to the airport. Suby is fiercely independent to this day.

My great, great grandmother was fearless. Maybe that is where Suby got her strength. Grandma Harriet's husband, Alvis was held prisoner for a time by Southern soldiers during the Civil War. When Grandma Harriet learned the location of the Southern prison, she went there alone to secure Grandpa’s release. The terms of his release were that they should leave the area immediately. It is unclear whether they were driven from their home by Southern soldiers or escorted out of the area by them. Grandma Harriet said in spite of all the evil she had heard concerning the enemy, she was never treated more courteously by anyone.  One day when Harriet and her two youngest were the only ones at home, hounds chased a deer into the yard. They killed it and dressed out the meat, thus supplying the family with some good venison.  

This reminds of a song from the movie "Toys." Here are the lyrics

Let Joy and Innocence Prevail

Song by Grace Jones

I tell you of a girl, her husband was a soldier

Gone to war in some strange country far away

No word had come to her but the rumors of great battles fought

And dying in their thousands and the world full of fear

As the day would turn to evening she would light a pure white candle

And place it in a window bright from where it could be seen

As she placed it in the window softly without thinking

She said let this burning candle be a beacon

Let joy and innocence prevail

Let joy and innocence prevail

Believe that luck will never fail

Let joy and innocence prevail

And one night, asleep

She dreamed she saw her husband fall

In a great white cavalry charge

And waking in tears

She saw the candle burning in the window

She still had hope

And through the window

A man in the distance

But as he came closer

She saw he was a stranger

The stranger said, "I bring a message from a General

A captain has been wounded, his life hangs by a thread

He calls out your name and he wishes you to come to him

But the journey is a hard road and you may be afraid"

And she laughed and said, "No road could be too hard for I am fearless

A captain and a husband, I have gained this bright new day"

And she said with all her heart, she would fly to be beside him

And her love would heal his wounds, restore him to her

Let joy and innocence prevail

Let joy and innocence prevail

Believe that luck will never fail

Let joy and innocence prevail

Let joy and innocence prevail

Let joy and innocence prevail

Believe that luck will never fail

Let joy and innocence prevail

Let joy and innocence prevail

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandrajerome.com/

Your Grandkids Don’t Want your Junk

 

I recently found out that I’m 14% Swedish.  I cannot figure out how, other than the fact that my mother’s side came from Northern Germany, Denmark and The Netherlands.  Someone in that group must have also come from Sweden.

Granddaughter #3, spent the year after graduation in 2015 from the IB program as a Rotary Exchange student in Sweden.  I know that was hard on her; the winters are brutal and it was her first time truly being away from home for so long.  But she was so brave and toughed it out and now lives in Oregon; about as far from our home in Florida that you can get!  Gosh, I miss her! Recently, I suggested that she get a scanner so that she could easily send electronically the artwork she was creating for a book we are working on together, but she admitted that she didn't have the space.  During a Zoom visit, she took me on a "tour" of her little room in the attic where she lives.  It is a tiny space, but she has truly made it a home and she is happy.

 Over the years, we have downsized our houses.  At one time, we had 5 bedrooms and almost 4,000 square feet in Camas, Washington.  We’ve had houses with acres of land, ocean and mountain views.  We’ve lived on a golf course and had swimming pools. We built our "dream home" in Port Angeles, but had to move after 9/11 and they stopped flying into our town.  

Today we live in a smaller two-bedroom cottage house close to our passion, Disney World, with a little fenced back yard. Oddly enough, I grow more food now than I did when we had acres of land. Our house is actually less cluttered, because I read an article that discussed the concept of the Swedish Death Cleansing.  Once you reach the end of middle age you get rid of all the stuff you’ve accumulated that you don’t need anymore — so that no one else has to do it for you after you pass. That’s according to Margareta Magnusson, author of a book, The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter." I learned this lesson when I moved my dad from his home into assisted living.  It was filled with things from his first marriage to my mom, 2^nd marriage to Dorothy after she moved into assisted living, and junk from my brother Stan and sister-in-law Cindy when they lived there when Stan died.  It also had junk from Cindy’s parents after they died and even her mother’s 2^nd marriage.  I learned a lesson that nobody, especially your grandkids, wants your junk.  I had a huge collection of these heavy Disney sculptures by Ron Lee and I recently donated most of them away to a local thrift shop that helps the homeless.  We have firm rule in our family; no garage sales, no selling stuff on eBay.  We have been fortunate to have what we need (not necessarily everything we "want") and we believe in "pay it forward" and donating or giving away anything we don't need anymore.  

When Covid 19 became a pandemic, I got serious about thinning things out and organizing my legal paperwork.  I discussed our wishes with my two good friends, Gayle and Laura and asked them to take on the burden of liquating our things for the granddaughters.  I have set aside a small piece of jewelry for each, written a letter, and suggested a piece of artwork they might like; but  don't expect any of them to deal with our junk! 

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandijerome.com/

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