Catch Me If You Can

I recently received a 1-star review for one of my books. All the rest are 4s or 5s. I know exactly who did this. Yes, I have high-tech skills, and yes, I'm a computer hacker, but I'm confused about why this person did this. For me, doing this is stealing. It is the low of lows. Their revenge isn't a victory; it’s a revelation.

I once worked for a man who was suspicious of everyone, and he suspected employees were stealing from him. I was provided a free new car to drive as part of my job, but I had to pay for the gas. One day, I was underneath a huge printer, changing the ribbon, and Mr. Boss came into the parts department and asked the manager, "Is Sandi paying for her gas?" I came out from under the printer and took Mr. Boss aside. "Look," I told him quietly, "if I want to steal from you, I will steal the whole gas truck, not just a few gallons a week. With my computer skills, you'd never find it."

Yes, I am a hacker. I started using computers in the 70s, before most hackers' PARENTS were born! Computer science was my minor in college, and accounting was my major. As a CPA, we know where the money is buried. The IRS provides a 10% reward for turning in cheaters, but if I had ever done that, I'd be writing this from my yacht instead of my Florida home. But CPAs are not like lawyers; if the IRS asks us for information, there is no client/CPA confidence. We have to spill the beans. In fact, we have the responsibility to report fraud. Tax professionals, including Certified Public Accountants (CPAs) and tax attorneys, are obligated to report potential instances of tax evasion or fraud by their clients. He once argued with me that 3 years had passed on a questionable deduction - but in cases of fraud, the statute of limitations for assessment of tax never expires. The IRS can go back as many years as it wants to investigate and assess taxes, penalties, and interest. I let my boss know that, and now he had two things to worry about, but theft was his main focus.

Mr. Boss began weekly sessions in which I would tell him various ways I could steal from him. The gas truck theft would be easy, I explained to him. I'm the one who orders and approves the fuel tanks to be filled. I'd issue the purchase order, but then have the gas delivered to one of the parents on a soccer team I coached, who owns a gas station. I'd split it with the guy. A pretty easy way to steal $28,000-$40,000 every few weeks. But I explained to my extremely wealthy boss that there are three types of people. The first type is totally dishonest. They will steal at any opportunity. It is their true nature. But fortunately, most of these people are working the streets, running cons, or sitting in prison. The second group is totally honest. Born honest and raised honest. When they find a twenty-dollar bill, they pick it up and ask around, "Did anyone drop this?" I like to think I am in this group. It is the way my parents raised me. Plus, why would I ever risk everything I have: my CPA license, my home, my family, my freedom –  just to steal? Money has never been a motivator for me. It is only a measure of how much I'm appreciated.

The third group? That's where it gets interesting. They are honest until they're not. Something happens that makes them feel entitled. They feel underpaid or unappreciated. They rationalize. "That person owes me." That's when the trouble starts. I gave a workshop at the annual AICPA conference on employee theft, titled "Catch Me If You Can." I think it is the only CPA workshop where you can't buy a DVD of my presentation. The board was worried employees would use it to steal from their employers! I had so many ideas!

I came up with the title after reading the 1980 book Catch Me If You Can by Frank Abagnale Jr. and journalist Stan Redding. That book inspired the 2002 Spielberg film starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hanks. The book describes how Abagnale donned a pilot's uniform and copiloted a Pan Am jet, masqueraded as the supervising resident of a hospital, practiced law without a license, passed himself off as a college sociology professor, and cashed over $2.5 million in forged checks – and all before he was twenty-one. It's written in the first person and reads almost like a thriller. Fast-paced and entertaining, Abagnale recounts his various cons and escapes across multiple countries.

Here's where it gets interesting: the book is acknowledged to have been partly fictionalized, and the factual basis for the events has been challenged. Abagnale himself acknowledged issues with accuracy. He stated, "I was interviewed by the co-writer only about four times. I believe he did a great job telling the story, but he also overdramatized and exaggerated parts of it. That was his style and what the editor wanted." More damning, in 2020, journalist Alan C. Logan conducted an in-depth investigation and found documents that contradicted many of Abagnale's claims. Logan's investigation revealed that Abagnale was in Great Meadow Prison in New York between the ages of 17 and 20 (1965-1968). That was the exact time frame during which Abagnale claimed to have committed his most significant scams. So ironically, the greatest con Frank Abagnale may have pulled was convincing the world his cons were real in the first place. Today, he'd probably be a computer hacker.

I'd like to finish with a thought. Is hacking stealing?

I honed my hacking skills when I owned a technology company and received a ransomware demand. I circumvented the hacker and didn't pay the ransom. I have only used my powers for good. Remember, I was raised to be good. But finding out about this 1-star review? I'm not sure I'm at peace with this person. It feels intentional. A type of revenge against me. My best friend wants me to write a "best revenge book" because I have told her so many ways to get a pound of flesh, but maybe I should let it go.

Hey, does anyone want to release an updated "Catch Me If You Can"? The best ideas in Frank's book didn't even make it to the screen, and I have hundreds more. But today, I'm not writing screenplays - I'm creating my own animated series, so I'm going to move on, let it go –  and not let this dark person get inside my head. If you want to see one of my videos that helped me decide to "let it go," please watch my YouTube video - https://youtu.be/LPUMiMM4JE0.

Happy New Year, and more about my web series next month when you catch up with me when you can!

A Hallmark Christmas

This month, my best friend, Laura (right,) visited me for a week. There aren't that many people who knew me as my mother's daughter, so we talked a lot about our mothers. 

My mother loved Christmas – every inch of our home was decorated. She made a magical bonbon – and I'm often asked for the recipe. One problem – I don't have it. My mom never wrote it down before she died unexpectedly, and we lost more that day than her secret ingredients.

As kids, I admired Laura's mother; she was a professional woman and they lived in an immaculate house. When I asked why their sewing machine was in the master bedroom when they had both a family room and a rarely used living room, Laura laughed. Appearances were important in her family and nobody touched their formal living room. In our home, the sewing machine was on the dining room table because we ate in the kitchen. For my family, everything was about functionality. Eating was number one; my mother was an amazing cook - in fact, my maiden name was Cook. Mom's dining room and kitchen looked like a Hallmark movie set during a bonbon contest.

Last month, we welcomed a dashing young man, Luis, from Ecuador into our family when my scientist granddaughter, Vrinda Jerome, became Vrinda Silva. He loves to cook! While up in Jacksonville for the wedding, I watched a marathon batch of Christmas movies. A few months ago I had finished writing my Hallmark-like movie, Christmas Bonbons, which is being shopped by the same Hijacked producer Autumn Bailey (On a Wing and a Prayer with Dennis Quaid.) Hijacked was an adaptation from a true book about the heroes of flight 705. Christmas Bonbons was my first Hallmark structured movie. I loved writing it. The 9-acts and Hallmark "rules" are like catnip to a former programmer like me that loves structures.  For those of you considering a career writing Hallmark Christmas Movies, here's the most common format;

Act 1 -  Setup. The heroine has a happy life, but something is missing.

Act 2 -  Inciting incident. She has to travel somewhere; maybe home for the holidays or a  project for work. Often is is snowing when she gets there.

Act 3. Meet Cute. She arrives - and by chance, she encounters the romantic interest, who can be her long-lost first love or involved in her work project. But it can also be a family friend, or the friendly town vet, or even a guy that sells Christmas trees.

Act 4. Debate - as her situation gets more challenging and that frustrating romantic interest is always just there, resulting in many more encounters where the guy makes himself useful, and sometimes frustrates her and she wants to leave, but she has to finish something first.

Act 5. Almost kiss -  they begin to enjoy spending time together. This is also where they touch accidentally, or look into each other's eyes - and then,  one of them says awkwardly, "I should go..." something isn't right about them being together as they almost kiss.

Act 6. Fun and games. They finally get over that reason why things are awkward, find themselves in a snow ball fight, or trying to decorate a tree, or make cookies, and get interrupted right before their lips meet. Sometimes there is a town contest for the best decoration of some sort and they compete.

Act 7. BUT - something is wrong; he said/she said - misunderstandings, rumours, and she thinks she should go back home because she's afraid - or he doesn't seem to feel the same way about her..

Act 8. Finally – one of them, has the courage to tell the other how they really feel thanks the classic mentor who often is wearing a Santa Hat. Feelings are real, they are falling in love! She maybe decides to move back home, or he's going to move to where she lives. A new life is beginning. Their life together matters.

Act 9. They live happy ever after and the whole family (or town) joins them around the Christmas tree for a group picture or singing a Christmas carole.

There are also some of the Hallmark traits and rules;

1. No words like crazy, hate, NO profanity

2. Christmas in almost every scene

3. NO religion

4. Must decorate a Christmas tree

5. Theme uplifting

6. Make Christmas food like cookies

7. No sex scenes

8. Few displays of affection

9. One snowball fight

10. One kiss at the end

11. Must have a happy ending.

I'm not sure my Christmas Bonbons is a perfect script yet, I probably have some rewrites it its future, but I also and I haven't given up trying to recreate that bonbon recipe of my mom's. The difference between a writer and a professional writer is that a professional never gives up. I'd write more this month, but today I'm getting down my Christmas decorations from the attic. I love Christmas.

Taking Chances

One of my dad's favorite sayings about Las Vegas is, "They didn't build those big casinos from our winnings." I don't like to gamble; it must be the accountant in me. The odds are not in my favor. The most I've ever done is put a few coins in a slot machine with predictable results - I didn't win. 

But as part of my screenwriting training, I wanted to do the opposite of the recommendation "write what you know." Could I learn something from a book, then write about it?  A true screenwriter can be told a pitch - somebody else's dream and story and then craft a movie or TV pilot.  I want to be able to do that. How hard could it be to write about blackjack - a game I've never played?

I had seen my husband and best friend play blackjack In Las Vegas, and one time, my best friend, Laura, called me over and handed me a pile of chips and said, "Don't give these back to me, no matter how much I beg."  I thought, "What a weird game."  I bought a book about blackjack and learned about card counting and the basic strategy.  

My screenplay, Last Hand, was born.  I entered it in Nicholls and was a Quarter Finalist, but since then, I've done a lot of rewrites to focus on the emotional issue of the special relationship between a father and daughter. I shaved off twenty pages to make it a better financial risk, removing the water skiing scenes. I made my main character Cherokee and changed her name from Madison to Kimi - which means secret in Cherokee. My story has lots of secrets.  The reviews have been good, and I'm a Quarter Finalist in a 2023 contest.

 "Last Hand" is a well-crafted story that features strong character development, a clear plot direction, and relatable themes. The film does an excellent job of balancing its multiple storylines, while also maintaining a consistent tone and pace throughout. 

One of the strengths of the film is its fully-realized characters.  Her father, Flip, is a flawed character whose past mistakes continue to haunt him. The other characters in the film are also well-developed and add depth and nuance to the story.  The film's plot is driven by clear goals and conflicts. 

Overall, "Last Hand" is a strong character-driven drama that is sure to appeal to a wide audience. The film's themes of family, legacy, and addiction are universal and relatable, and its well-crafted plot and characters will keep viewers engaged from start to finish.  

In some ways, I've been taking chances by trying various genres and formats. I've been asked, "Do you want to write sitcoms, novels, movies, or animation?" My answer is simple - yes!  I love writing, I spend hours doing it every day.  I go to bed at night thinking of my scripts and wake up excited to start writing. I am lucky because I type as fast as I think, and I have fantastic technology skills - so using screenwriting software is easy for me.

Most Vegas movies fare well - people enjoy watching films about their dreams of being a winner.  In 2008 a movie came out, 21, about the MIT Blackjack Team that used scientific theory to make a bundle. It only cost $35 million and grossed $159 million. I hope someone will take a chance on my screenplay, Last Hand.

Lucky I'm in Love with My Best Friend

 

I met my husband in the spring of 1972, the year I graduated from high school.  Farrell's Ice Cream Parlor was opening in our small town and my best friend, Laura and I wanted to work there. It was a “cool” place in so many ways.  I was already accepted as an International Agriculture major at Cal Poly Pomona with a full scholarship.  I had enough credits to graduate from high school after the first semester, so I was able to leave school at 10:30AM because my favorite teacher, Mr. Alstrum let me be his teaching assistant for that 4th period.  I got hired as a daytime waitress for the lunch shift, and Laura was a nighttime cashier.  Close to opening day, Keith came in from another Farrell’s and was charged with teaching all of us how to properly fill the condiment jars according to health department rules.  I made a comment to my friend, “I can’t believe this guy is showing us how to fill a jar” and I swear I heard a growl to go with his icy stare. 

From then on, it was “game on '' between us.  Keith was our assistant manager and was engaged to get married in a year. I first dated a few of the guys at Farrell’s, but then started seriously dating seriously the area training supervisor, Jack.  The year before, I had broken up with my high school sweetheart, who had gotten his boss’s daughter pregnant.  He had a shotgun marriage during our senior year. I started dating for the first time in my life during my senior year, but I was getting tired of playing all the dating games.  Although I was a flower child of the seventies and enjoyed going to parties, drinking, smoking pot, and spending my days off at the beach, I was looking for a more serious relationship like I had for over three years with my steady boyfriend in high school.  I continuously got disappointed.  But this new guy I was dating had his own apartment, a nifty sports car, and he was seven years older.  Jack also wanted a serious relationship.  He was an intellectual that could discuss philosophical matters for hours and a talented artist.  But it was hard for me to relate to Jack.  When you’re only seventeen, those many years in age difference are difficult. Keith was less than a year older than me, but born an old soul.  He was organized, serious, and focused.  Even today, we tease him about his “Spidey Sense '' or ability to sense danger.  He tells our granddaughters to always trust their naturally inherited “Spidey Sense '' and get away from any situation that doesn’t seem right.

Keith and I had an ongoing adversary attraction.  I would toss something from the salad station at him while he walked by, or endlessly tease him about being too young to get married. My pestering and teasing started getting his attention and we began sneaking off after work to the park, or to the beach to talk.  We’d talked about how similar our childhoods were.  Both of our mothers were strong Catholics girls who came from immigrant families who occasionally spoke their native languages in the home.  His grandmother came from Italy and my mother’s family was German.  Both of our fathers came from a long line of British families that had come to America in the 1700s.  Keith is the fifth cousin of Winston Churchill twice removed. My father’s family came from Yorkshire, England and my great grandfather and great great grandfather were Baptist preachers.  Each of our fathers had converted to Catholicism to marry Catholic girls.  My father’s family had suffered terribly in World War II, losing their oldest son in Germany and a son-in-law as a Navy pilot in the Pacific.  How could my grandmother possibly approve of her only surviving son marrying a German girl like my mom when less than five years earlier her favorite son had died at the hands of the Germans on Christmas Day in the Battle of the Bulge? My dad said, “we told your grandma that your mom was Danish.”  This was partly true since my mom’s family came from northern Germany, and one great grandparent was born in Denmark, another in The Netherlands.  Keith’s father served during the war as a Navy Seabee, and then the Navy as a career, eventually retiring as a Chief. 

After a few months, Keith and I broke up with our existing partners, and we started dating seriously.  He did so many kind things! He would replace my torn beach towel, and rushed to open the car door for me.  He would help me be a 4-H Junior Leader, getting all my young 4-H team’s sheep ready for judging at the fair. Oddly enough, even though I grew up in a more rural west coast town, it wasn’t expected to go to college after high school.  Many of my fellow classmates merely took up a trade, got married, and settled down.  I wanted to go to college, but the night before I was supposed to leave for Cal Poly, I wrote a letter to the scholarship board and asked that my scholarship funds be transferred to the local community college, Mira Costa in Oceanside that had an agricultural program.  I liked Keith so much and I didn’t want to be far away from him.  I'm not sure when I fell in love with Keith, but I liked him so much that I wanted to be with him.  There is a song that I think sums this up;  "Lucky I'm in love with my best friend, Lucky to have been where I have been..."

I did end up getting my degree, but that is for another blog.

Visit my YouTube Account - Owen the Giraffe

Friends for Life - Laura and Sandi with an "i"

 

Laura is my best (non-husband) friend.  We met during 8th grade.  She had sat down in the science class and a few of my friends; Wendy, Sheila, and Kathleen asked Laura to save a seat for “Sandy.”  I came in late and found that empty seat next to Laura.  Laura had moved to Escondido from Arizona where her father had been stationed in the Air Force.  Laura was so much more worldly than me; she had lived and traveled all over the world including a time in the Philippines.   In a few months was her 13th birthday and she asked me to go to Disneyland with her.  At some point, Laura decided that she would like to spell my name with an “I” so that she could make smiley faces or hearts from the dot.  To this day, Laura and I are close and my name is now Sandi with an "i".  We email weekly to stay in touch better since neither of us likes to travel.

Laura’s family were sort of like Ward and June Cleavers of Leave to Beaver for me. Their home at close to Glenview in Escondido was my image of an ideal home; tastefully decorated, organized and clean.  The yard and lawn were manicured.  Her mom was a professional woman; she worked at the school district, dressed well, spoke softly and again, my ideal of June Cleaver.  Her was like any typical 1960s family; with the dad, always in the garage and grunted most of his answers.  I loved how he talked to Laura with his deep voice, calling her Laura Lee or Laurie.  I was so envious of their lifestyle.  Laura’s older brother, David was highly intelligent and talked down to us, but thankfully ignored us.  I think he ended up being a professional student, so rarely at home. 

Laura (on the left above) was very involved in the yearbook in high school and was named the editor for our senior year.  She named me the photo editor which was lots of fun.  I would grab a staff photographer and go to events or advertising engagements and get to set up the shot.  We do have one claim to fame our senior year.  For years we had belonged to the Pep Club and painted these huge posters that the football team runs through.  Nobody seemed to appreciate them.  The pep club president, Sheana had attended a college game where the sign said “Screw Navy” (not sure of the actual team) and had a cute little guy with a screw going through the middle.  We thought it was funny.  For the big Escondido High vs. Orange Glen game, we made a similar sign that said “Screw Escondido” and a cartoon character with a screw through him.  When we put up the sign, the cheering crowd was silent.  Unexpected results.  The team ran through it unknowingly, and then the principal ran down on the field and rounded the 4 or us up.  We were in big trouble and were told to be in his office Monday morning.  That morning, he looked at us and said, “I should suspend all of you for this, but between the four of you, most of the student clubs and organizations would shut down.”  He went on to say that with Laura running the yearbook and having upcoming deadlines and with me being the assistant treasurer and responsible for paying all the student club bills, he couldn’t suspend us. Over the next few weeks, we were shocked to realize that this is probably a record number of letters to the editor – all fully against one thing.  We had united our mostly Republican town against a common enemy; that horrible sign!  When I took the yearbook picture of our principal, the theme was to something with our hands.  I asked him do that and he is pointing at me and saying, “Don’t you ever do anything like that again.”  Nobody probably knows that except me.  The picture still makes me smile.

The top picture of Laura and me is from grad night - 1972 at Disneyland. We had decided to go with each other instead of having dates. I was worried about staying up all night, so my drug-dealer brother gave us some speed which we had never taken before. Needless to say, it made us sick and as we entered the park, we were in bad shape. Two very cute guys saw us and we explained what happened. They offered to escort us around until we felt better and Laura and I ended up having a great time. Unfortunately, I think we ended up running into every guy who we had turned down for dates that evening and each thought we were lying when we said we wanted to go without a date since we obviously had these "dates." When we got home, we decided to sleep on the beach. I snuggled down into my sleeping bag and because of the drug, I didn't wake up until later the next day. Laura was next to me in her bikini - sunning and stunning on the beach. I was a human burrito and a mess!

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandijerome.com/