Joyful and Fearless

 

Can I be Fearless?

In 1992, 20th Century Fox handed director Barry Levinson a blank check. Robin Williams was at the height of his popularity, fresh off hits like "Good Morning, Vietnam," "Dead Poets Society," and the voice of the Genie in "Aladdin." The supporting cast included Joan Cusack, Michael Gambon, and Robin Wright. The film had stars, songs, a massive budget, and every ingredient that should have guaranteed a hit. 

Yet when "Toys" was released in December 1992, it opened in sixth place and limped away with just over $23 million at the box office, barely half its budget. Barry Levinson was even nominated for a Razzie Award for Worst Director. How could such a well-resourced project fail so spectacularly?

The answer lies in a perfect storm of missteps that began before cameras even rolled. Barry Levinson and his then-wife, Valerie Curtin, developed the screenplay in 1979, inspired by a newspaper article about Soviet naval intelligence studying American submarine toy models. The script itself became a victim of its own ambition. Despite twelve years of preparation, the screenplay seemed pulled in two directions. The producers kept describing it as "whimsical," while studios kept interpreting it as a dark comedy. 

Even Robin Williams seemed oddly restrained, playing it warm and cuddly when the film desperately needed his manic energy. The result was a film that critics found visually stunning, but the story was confused, and audiences simply couldn't connect with what they were watching. 

But there was one part of the movie I enjoyed: the song "Let Joy and Innocence Prevail," sung by Grace Jones.

I tell you of a girl, her husband was a soldier
Gone to war in some strange country far away
No word had come to her but the rumors of great battles fought
And dying in their thousands and the world full of fear
As the day would turn to evening she would light a pure white candle
And place it in a window bright from where it could be seen
As she placed it in the window softly without thinking
She said let this burning candle be a beacon
Let joy and innocence prevail
Let joy and innocence prevail
Believe that luck will never fail
Let joy and innocence prevail
And one night, asleep
She dreamed she saw her husband fall
In a great white cavalry charge
And waking in tears
She saw the candle burning in the window
She still had hope
And through the window
A man in the distance
But as he came closer
She saw he was a stranger
The stranger said, "I bring a message from a General
A captain has been wounded, his life hangs by a thread
He calls out your name and he wishes you to come to him
But the journey is a hard road and you may be afraid"
And she laughed and said, "No road could be too hard for I am fearless
A captain and a husband, I have gained this bright new day"
And she said with all her heart, she would fly to be beside him
And her love would heal his wounds, restore him to her
Let joy and innocence prevail
Let joy and innocence prevail
Believe that luck will never fail
Let joy and innocence prevail
Let joy and innocence prevail
Let joy and innocence prevail
Believe that luck will never fail
Let joy and innocence prevail
Let joy and innocence prevail!

"Toys" remains a fascinating cautionary tale about what happens when unlimited resources meet unclear vision. But there's another lesson in this film, one that Grace Jones captured perfectly in the film's haunting song. The film's central message, that we must choose joy and innocence over warfare and destruction, resonates today.

A decade ago, my own husband faced his own battle: triple bypass surgery, then a stroke two years later. The doctors wanted him to stay in the hospital for two weeks of physical therapy, but he wanted to come home. He complained about the noise that prevented him from sleeping, the lack of regular meals, and they hadn't started any physical therapy. I was fearless enough to sign those release and liability forms and take him home, even though he couldn't walk and I could barely get him out of the car. 

I became his personal physical therapist, watching YouTube videos and working with him all day. I put my programming projects on hold. In two days, he no longer needed the walker. In two weeks, he was walking to the mailbox. In two months, he was back at Disney, walking three miles a day. Like the woman in Grace Jones's song who said, "No road could be too hard for I am fearless," I learned that fearlessness and joy are not opposites; they are partners. You can be brave enough to defy the doctors, bold enough to bet on love and healing, while still holding tight to the joy and innocence that make life worth fighting for. "Toys" failed because it lost sight of that balance. My husband had lost the part of his brain that gave him balance and the doctors said he'd probably never walk again without a walker, but we've had a decade of travel and spending days at Disney. The walker still sits in the corner of the closet.

I'm writing the 4th book in my Kira and Henry series, War Games, while my husband is fighting his health battles again. When I write YA novels and screenplays, I use the Save the Cat! structure, and unlike Toys, I always know what my story is about and how it should be told. I become fearless and disciplined, but keep the joy of writing, because in life, in love, in the moments that truly matter, we cannot afford to lose it. It is time for me to be fearless again. And it is time to let joy and innocence prevail. 

Note: My April 2021 blog about my fearless granddaughter, Suby, tells the story of my great, great-grandmother on the Cook side of the family, who was truly fearless and went behind enemy lines to bring her captured husband home during the Civil War. 

The above picture is of my granddaughter, Tulaasi, on Mount Cook in the Ben Ohau Range of New Zealand's South Island. She and my oldest granddaughter, Chandra, fearlessly worked for years in Australia, New Zealand, and throughout Europe. My granddaughter, Vrinda, who is required to wear snake-proof boots to work as a field biologist in the Florida wilderness, is fearless. More about them in future blogs

I have been writing this monthly blog for over 6 years, every month - and I have so many stories I've yet to tell!

Happy Holidays to all of you!

Out of my Comfort Zone

The Twilight Saga is my favorite series of films and books. I discovered the books from a 12-year-old.  Almost two decades ago,  I wrote an algorithm for a dating site based on music preferences and met in the patent attorney's office in Portland to explain the logic. During a break, I noticed one of the lawyers' kids reading Twilight. He gave such an amazing pitch that I stopped by Barnes and Noble on the way home (pre-Kindle days) and bought the book. I was hooked. 

After the movies came out, we took our granddaughters up to lunch at the View Point Inn, and it was magical to be there. My love for the Pacific Northwest beaches propelled me to buy a vacation home on the Oregon coast, a few miles away from where the beach scenes were filmed.  I was on "Team Jacob" during the movie since I'm Native American and rooting for the tribe and wolves.

Over the years, I've been fascinated with wolves, especially after finding out that we are descendants of the Wolf Clan of the Cherokee tribe. I wrote a Hallmark-like romantic comedy script a few years ago, Nature's Way, set in Seattle and Port Angeles, that discusses the reintroduction of wolves into the National Parks. After doing genealogy research about my family's life before they were relocated from North Carolina to Oklahoma during the Trail of Tears, I wrote my first solo YA/MG book, Sleep Warrior, set in Cherokee, NC and the Eastern Band of the Cherokees. However, I wanted to learn more about my Oklahoma roots since my grandmother went back to the reservation close to Tulsa to die.

A few months ago, I went to Washington, D.C., to see one of my pictures that was accepted into the Smithsonian's Mirror, Mirror exhibit about the Disney Parks. While there, I visited the National Zoo and spent a lot of time with the red wolves - watching them. I decided to write a script centered around the red wolves - but in Oklahoma.  I've never written a teen light horror/fantasy script, nor one with a male lead, so I decided to write Blood Moon Wolf for my Native American Media Alliance Feature Film project this month. I had pitched 3 scripts, and this one was my last choice.  First was Kidnapped Kangaroo, which I've started this month writing as a YA book, and next was Chocolate Factory Death, based on a near panic attack I had around the loud machinery inside the Lindt chocolate factory I toured last year in Cologne, Germany.

But my cohorts liked my Blood Moon Wolf  "mini treatment" the best, so I took a deep breath and jumped into the abyss of the unknown. Teenagers as the leads? How do they talk? I reached back into the memory of helping to raise my four granddaughters and decided to name the wolf after the oldest; the leader of the pack - Chandra.  My other character, Riana a combination of Suby, Vrinda, and Tulaasi - very strong young ladies.

The one thing that made it easier was that the instructor taught us the 8-sequence method. Wow, for someone who spent a career in a highly structured world of programming and accounting, this was catnip for me. I like to say that you can eat an elephant if you start with one bite at a time...meaning that breaking down a huge project like writing a DMS system can be done by one person. I proved that right when I created DealerStar DMS fifteen years ago and sold it a few years ago. Now, I get to write full-time, and I hope to never eat an elephant because I'm a vegan and animal lover. If I write a great movie, it will be because my cohorts coaxed me out of my comfort zone, and my instructor gave me a tool to keep me sane - along with the inspiration of my four granddaughters. 

I've been doing YouTube videos - to help promote my books - and I'm working on my Amazing Animal Kingdom series. If only we had wolves! Here's the Amazing Animals playlist. Thank goodness I don't have aspirations as a filmmaker!  But I love to tell my stories!

Next will be a video about my Wild Africa Trek adventure - really out of my comfort zone!

Here's the link to my videos about Disney's Animal Kingdom

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLx_8Ja4anZU7PdLL_kyT3kkTNaz3BhCQl

Time Spent with Cats is Never Wasted

 It was Freud who said, "Time spent with cats is never wasted." I grew up on an avocado ranch with a dozen or so cats. They were "working cats" because they hunted and killed the gophers that ate the avocado tree roots.  But to me, they were pets. I gave each one a name, and the matriarch of the group was called "Funny Face." 

I made Funny Face an animal character in my latest book, Murder at the Magic Kingdom, and gave her two kittens named Lilo and Loki, which are the names of two of my granddaughter's dogs (belonging to Suby and Tulaasi.) I also have two grand furbaby cats that belong to Chandra; Jade and Jasper. They are the toddler twins in my book. I've always loved spending time with animals, although today, it is mostly from afar at zoos since I married a non-pet lover guy. But I always include some animals in my writing. My first solo Middle-Grade book, Sleep Warrior, had two flying bears. My next one will have wolves.

Along with writing, I love reading, and lately, I've read a lot of YG and MG fiction.  One of my favorite MG authors is Rebecca Stead. I almost did not become an MG writer because of her. While reading a fantastic book: Writing Irresistible Kidlit: The Ultimate Guide to Crafting Fiction for Young Adult and Middle-Grade Readers, author Mary Kole recommends Rebecca's book, When You Reach Me.  After reading Rebecca's book, I thought, "I will never be that good." This book is a Newbery-Award-winning book that Mary uses to show writing in different types of POV (the character often addresses an unknown "You") and illustrates Unconscious Objectives.  I just finished another one of Rebecca Stead's books, The List of Things That Will Not Change. I enjoy stories of families coping with difficult situations. 

I read Red, White and Whole by Rajani LaRocca before the SCBWI conference and marveled at the new verse format.  This month, I was delighted to find another book in the same format that deals with a family tragedy;  Iveliz Explains It All by Andrea Beatriz Arango.  I'm also re-learning Spanish and delighted in the rich culture expressed in this book and enjoyed the "Spanglish." It reminds me of the richness of Salty, Bitter, Sweet written by CNN producer Mayra Cuevas.

I don't think I will ever write in verse; it was hard enough to transition from being a screenwriter to a novelist, and I was never a poet. But this format is fantastic for readers, the same way graphic novels have created a huge following.  Similar to a short story, these two formats enable me to read a whole book in a day and enjoy the artistic value of a graphic novel and the flowing craftsmanship of poetry in a verse novel.  I think the key is to read and encourage kids to read, even if it is a shorter graphic novel or verse novel.

My new mantra is "Time spent with a book is never wasted."  Even better if you're reading a book with a cat on your lap! Here's a picture of the real Jade and Jasper.

If you’re interested in critiquing my latest book, Murder in the Magic Kingdom here is the link where you can read the PDF version and I promise - I can take your criticism!

https://www.yogaiteach.com/MurderattheMagicKingdomPDF.pdf

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Thanks!

 

Your Grandkids Don’t Want your Junk

 

I recently found out that I’m 14% Swedish.  I cannot figure out how, other than the fact that my mother’s side came from Northern Germany, Denmark and The Netherlands.  Someone in that group must have also come from Sweden.

Granddaughter #3, spent the year after graduation in 2015 from the IB program as a Rotary Exchange student in Sweden.  I know that was hard on her; the winters are brutal and it was her first time truly being away from home for so long.  But she was so brave and toughed it out and now lives in Oregon; about as far from our home in Florida that you can get!  Gosh, I miss her! Recently, I suggested that she get a scanner so that she could easily send electronically the artwork she was creating for a book we are working on together, but she admitted that she didn't have the space.  During a Zoom visit, she took me on a "tour" of her little room in the attic where she lives.  It is a tiny space, but she has truly made it a home and she is happy.

 Over the years, we have downsized our houses.  At one time, we had 5 bedrooms and almost 4,000 square feet in Camas, Washington.  We’ve had houses with acres of land, ocean and mountain views.  We’ve lived on a golf course and had swimming pools. We built our "dream home" in Port Angeles, but had to move after 9/11 and they stopped flying into our town.  

Today we live in a smaller two-bedroom cottage house close to our passion, Disney World, with a little fenced back yard. Oddly enough, I grow more food now than I did when we had acres of land. Our house is actually less cluttered, because I read an article that discussed the concept of the Swedish Death Cleansing.  Once you reach the end of middle age you get rid of all the stuff you’ve accumulated that you don’t need anymore — so that no one else has to do it for you after you pass. That’s according to Margareta Magnusson, author of a book, The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter." I learned this lesson when I moved my dad from his home into assisted living.  It was filled with things from his first marriage to my mom, 2^nd marriage to Dorothy after she moved into assisted living, and junk from my brother Stan and sister-in-law Cindy when they lived there when Stan died.  It also had junk from Cindy’s parents after they died and even her mother’s 2^nd marriage.  I learned a lesson that nobody, especially your grandkids, wants your junk.  I had a huge collection of these heavy Disney sculptures by Ron Lee and I recently donated most of them away to a local thrift shop that helps the homeless.  We have firm rule in our family; no garage sales, no selling stuff on eBay.  We have been fortunate to have what we need (not necessarily everything we "want") and we believe in "pay it forward" and donating or giving away anything we don't need anymore.  

When Covid 19 became a pandemic, I got serious about thinning things out and organizing my legal paperwork.  I discussed our wishes with my two good friends, Gayle and Laura and asked them to take on the burden of liquating our things for the granddaughters.  I have set aside a small piece of jewelry for each, written a letter, and suggested a piece of artwork they might like; but  don't expect any of them to deal with our junk! 

Visit my website for info on my books - https://www.sandijerome.com/

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